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20.6.13

Finding Confidence for the Conference

So tomorrow is the day.  
The day a lot of us have been looking forward to, have been anxious about, have been planning, for months.

I've had various wobbles about meeting people, what people will think of me, whether or not people will like me, whether or not I will like the people I've followed and grown to really like for 2 years, and of course, my outfit and appearance in general.
I've seen lots of comments from people saying we shouldn't worry about what we wear because no one will notice or no one will care. And whilst I would like to believe that, I think it's a "female thing" to look at how other women are dressed.  We may not realise we're doing it but do judge someone on what they wear.
For example, Twitter on Saturday nights at the moment, at a particular time, will have a few tweets about Holly Willoughby.
"She looks amazing" "Holly looks hot" but then there's the other side "Holly shouldn't be wearing that" "That dress is too short" "Her hips are too wide" and so on.
We talk about Dawn French's weight. She's put some on, she's lost some, she's put some one, she's lost some.
We talk about how much botox people have had, their enhanced lips or chests. It's just something we do.
I think if we recognise that someone looks amazing then we also recognise if someone doesn't look so amazing.

I know if I arrived in a dress one size too small people would notice, and they would comment between themselves or think it at least.
I have major body issues at the moment. I have no one and nothing to blame for it other than myself and an addiction to food, using food as comfort at the moment and a lack of exercise. Therefore I am not at my best. That's not me being negative, that's me recognising who I am right now.
So choosing my outfit for Britmums has been a big thing. I wanted to choose something I feel comfortable in and that I look nice in. Something which fits and flatters my figure in any way it can.
I have chosen a couple of maxi dresses, along with a midi skirt and vest top for back up if I spill anything or if I don't feel comfortable enough for the colourful dress on Saturday.

Another reason I personally want to make an effort with what I wear, and to make sure I'm wearing something is because I want to make a good impression.
If I turned up wearing a tracksuit, with no make up on, and my hair up scruffy that I would have a completely different reaction from people than if I wore my maxi dress, had my hair styled nice and had done my make up.
Not only would I look better, but I would feel better.
And although my confidence isn't at an all time high at the moment, I am at least able to think "I feel nice, I think I look nice, so other people might do too".

Recently I've been using Pinterest as a coping mechanism when I've been feeling down and anxious, something I'm going to write about in a couple of weeks. And tonight I looked through my quotes folder to find which ones I think fit my frame of mind right now, and with the upcoming event. Also which quotes I need to digest and remember to help me through it.



These quotes are one's I found on Twitter but have applied to my own photos. Unless stated I am not aware of the author of the quote.