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6.2.14

Three.

Today marks a special date for me and my blog. It is our three year anniversary.
When I first started blogging I didn't think I would stick with it for a year let alone three years. I had started blogs before but they had never gone anywhere simply because I got bored or just forgot about it.
I didn't know that it would mean as much to me as it does. I didn't realise it would be such a big part of my life.

In three years my blog has experienced a baby gender announcement, a birth and birth trauma. Without my blog I'm not sure what I would have done with those thoughts I had when the birth trauma and flashbacks were so heavy on my mind.
I remember writing this post, All That I Can See, when I was feeling at my worse.
I've always been open about things I go through, about my life, not what I would call my private life, but things people experience everyday but may not talk about for whatever reason.
I know some people find that odd, and think it's oversharing, and due to this I actually held back on a lot of things last year so as to not be judged, I cut back on breastfeeding posts so I didn't offend certain people, and now I really regret that.
I vow to never let anyone get in the way of what I write. This is my space and as we all say, if you don't like it, don't read it. Simple.

In the past three years I have had some amazing opportunities. Some thanks to review items or things I have applied for. Going to Britmums Live last year was definitely a highlight, and I will always be grateful to Medela for sponsoring me to go, I can't wait to go this year too.
One of my main highlights though was being interviewed on Sky News. It's all such a blur now, I can't quite believe I did it. I am so proud of myself for doing it though, even though I am still critical of myself but you know what, being put on the spot and being asked questions about something so tough and emotional for you, and not knowing what you will be asked is really tough, so due to all that I think I did a good job.

In the last three years I have made some friends, and I have lost some friends. I'll always doubt people and have trust issues, thanks to experiences of friendships in school, growing up, in the workplace and onwards, but it has been really really wonderful to have been able to meet up with some blogging friends away from blogging completely. A sleepover being one of those moments and a lovely afternoon at a farm with Hayley was definitely a highlight from last year.
I suppose that's another wonderful thing about the last three years, and what blogging has brought to my life. I am friends with people I never would have met before, I have friends in all different areas of the UK, some closer than others but none close enough to pop around for a coffee everyday, yet always on the other end of the phone or Facebook for a serious conversation, a silly conversation, for advice or just to send silly animated pictures to each other.

I was going list posts that meant a lot to me but going through, there were too many to add. This little space of mine has been so important to me, for support, as therapy, and to stop loneliness at times, and just to keep me busy.

The best bit for me is to look back on the blog and be reminded of such wonderful times I've had over the last three years. Looking at how I have grown, how much the boys have grown, the fantastic days out we've had.

I can't imagine not ever having a blog, or ever stopping. Of course I have my days where I want to pack it all in but the majority of the time I adore it.
Here's to another fantasic year, lots more opportunities, getting this back to how I want it to be, and lots more growing.

Cheers!

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