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3.3.14

February 2014

I would imagine I'm not the only person completely shocked at the fact we are already in March. 
February seemed like such an odd month, and I can't quite put my finger on why. I feel like it's been so busy, without actually being that busy.
It might all just be in my head, I'm so full of ideas and things I want to do and how to do them. How to make changes and when is best to do so. I'm awful at this though. I make plans, for my blog mainly, and then never actually get round to doing it and before I know it it's too late. 

I'm making more of an effort to fight my anxiety and depression. Taking steps to not change, I'm not sure if I like the idea that I need to "change" because I don't choose to feel like that. I feel it needs a different word.
Half term marked a big step for me in what I do with the boys. I have some posts planned to go into detail on what I did and how I felt but a big problem of mine is going out with the boys by myself. I was so good at it when Harry was a newborn and Charles was a toddler but now, it fills me with fear, and it's mainly down to my thoughts.
But, we managed a trip to ToysRUs, a trip to the beach, a visit to a zoo and then onto another beach.
I was really proud of myself to be able to do that, although normal to other people, those things fill me with utter fear and panic.

We've been working hard on the boat, well when I say we I mean my husband and his dad have been working hard on the boat, in preparation of getting her in the water in a month or so's time. We visited our first boat show, researched further boat shows and even regattas. The one we are looking forward to most is the Three Rivers Race. We won't be in the position to join in, but will be moored in the perfect location to watch the yachts sail past. Hopefully the weather will be beautiful so we can enjoy a summery drink and one of my deluxe salads for dinner. 

If you follow me on Instagram you may have noticed a few foodie photos on there. I'm really trying to make an effort to sort out my diet. It's awful and getting on the scales makes me feel so ashamed, as does looking at my reflection.
I am looking at calories in foods which I didn't really do before. Especially bread, I was utterly shocked at how many calories there are in one slice of bread. So I've made changes and have decreased my bread intake, which was heartbreaking as I adore bread, and instead have wraps or crispbread/crumpets/pancakes.
I've also increased the vegetables I eat. At dinnertime I will choose meat over carbs or limit my meat and have more carbs, just like how the old style Slimming World used to be.

This month, summed into one word, would also be "discovering". I've discovered a lot of lovely new blogs and added them to my Bloglovin' list. I wanted to expand on my reading of parenting blogs to also read a few more beauty and lifestyle ones too. 
As well as discovering and rediscovering certain products, foods, songs and so on. 
And also some discovering when it comes to myself. Ways I think, ways I feel, how I can think differently about particular things to then control my feelings (that does make total sense!) And also how I cope with sticking up for myself and others, this is both good and bad.

Lastly I completed a second month of Living Arrows over on I Heart Snapping. 
Here is a round up of my photos for February.

March is going to be manic, mostly with boat things and my husband working a lot so I expect it to be super stressful but it will all be worth it when April comes and we are seeing out beautiful wooden yacht floating on the Norfolk Broads. It's going to be such a proud and emotional time. How lucky we are.

How was your month?