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28.5.14

Turning Corners

This Bank Holiday weekend we took full advantage of the wonderful weather and the fact that my husband had 2 days off rather than his usual 1, and headed to the boat to stay over for the night.
We got there later than originally planned so once we had got ourselves sorted, got the boat ready we simply motored up to one of our favourite pubs to moor up for the night.
It just so happens that we got there at just the right time. As we moored up, and turned the engine off, other boats seemed to have the same idea, but we had taken up one of the last two spaces, the other was quickly snapped up by another family.

There was a lovely bit of drama and entertainment when 3 boats managed to get stuck in the mud. One was clearly an accident, and was a tiny bit worrying for a while, and the other two were basically full of young people who didn't want to follow advice when told that the area was too shallow for them that day.

We had such a fabulous weekend, and on Sunday night and Monday night I couldn't help but to reflect on the good things that had happened, and realised that we had turned a few corners and that areas that have been somewhat challenging or tricky were getting much better.

Firstly, and yes I know, going on about it again. Bore off Lauren. But, my weight.
We sat in the pub garden and my husband took a photo of me. I always inspect the photos, usually clicking delete pretty much straight away.
But this time I burst into tears. I actually liked the photo. Not only did I like the photo, but I also noticed the change in me since I lost the weight.
I felt quite overwhelmed, which may sound silly, but it was nice to feel good about myself and to feel proud of myself.

Harry has hit the terrible twos, and a really quite challenging point in his life recently. He is hard work, we have good times and bad times. The bad times, although may only last a short amount of time, can be tiring and emotionally draining. He's just doing what some other 2 year olds do but still, it doesn't mean he should do it.
Our past trips on the boat have been a fail for a few reasons. Our first ever night over Harry was sick, which couldn't be helped. But at other times he has simply decided to just play up really.
He wasn't interested in sitting outside, or putting on his lifejacket.
Yet on Sunday, as I was ready to settle him into the cabin, he asked for his lifejacket to be put on.
And he actually sat outside with us. I couldn't believe it.
And on the Monday he came outside with me, laid on the seat with his head on my lap and went to sleep....for 2 hours. He missed our adventure and explore of a new part of the river, and missed seeing fish in the clear parts, but it was lovely to have him so close.
The whole weekend he was a star and I really enjoyed being with him. I just hope that behaviour remains every visit we have to the boat.

I'm really trying to work on Charles' confidence at the moment. He gets quite shy and wants me to speak for him so I'm setting him challenges to wave to people on boats, talk to people, order his own food, pay for things in shops and so on. He is doing really well and I can tell he gets a buzz out of "being brave" especially when he gets a response from those he is talking to or those who's attention he wants.

My husband had to go to the bow of the boat at one point as I went inside the cabin with the boys. He kept shouting to ask if we were ok and I couldn't understand why. Until I realised that it was because we were so quiet. Usually the boys are having issues with each other, issues with me, wanting a drink/food/wee/poo/something they shouldn't have, which usually results in me getting stressed and snapping at them.
But we were all quiet. Ok, Harry was asleep but it gave me the chance to relax and gave Charles the chance to play on his Leappad without his brother prodding the screen all the time.
As we got on the boat on the Sunday and waited for my husband to do his jobs I couldn't resist a selfie with them. They both wanted to press the button and change the colours on Instagram. I love it, a lot.

Another corner I have personally turned is that of feeling happy. Truly happy. Yes I still get my down days, and my really awful days, but being able to recognise what that happy emotion is, although can be quite overwhelming, is just magical sometimes.  It's a feeling I forgot about, and almost forced sometimes but to now feel genuinely happy in a few areas of my life is perfect, and proves I'm definitely turning corners.