This month has been tough.
For various reasons and it got to the point where it has affected my mental health. My anti-depressants are getting me through everyday but there is still that feeling of "I'm not very well at the moment".
I don't particularly want to socialise with people, other than my children and my cats. I don't particularly want to leave the house, let alone my bed.
I'm running with those feelings and actually, if that's my bodies way of telling me that this is what I need to do right now then I trust it. I don't want to put myself in a situation that I can't cope with, could potentially make me feel worse or cause a panic attack.



British Superbikes: Snetterton

A couple of weekends ago we did something a little different and tried something new.
Despite being a fan of the TT and a novice fan of Road Racing I've never really been interested in or looked at other kind of motorsports, especially anything like British Super Bikes. I've looked at it when it's been on tv but haven't been able to really get into it. However I do enjoy watching the odd clip on Facebook or YouTube.

We don't live too far away from Snetterton and driving past there to drive to Watford I noticed on the big Billboard that BSB was going to be there in July.
It wasn't my weekend with the boys and they were due to be with their dad, and I considered going by myself.
After thinking about it I asked if I could have them on the Sunday so they could come with me.
After seeing the price difference between Saturday and Sunday (Saturday £16, Sunday £35, boys were both free) I then decided to go on the Saturday and their dad kindly let me have them for the whole weekend.



I really enjoyed writing and have since enjoyed looking back and reading my "2019: The First Quarter Review". So I thought it was something I should definitely continue with. We'll ignore the fact that this is 2 months late!

The second quarter has been a bit of a funny one.
In March I got a 6 month promotion with work which was a real eye opener and an amazing opportunity and I really enjoyed it despite having to constantly ask for work and to ask what I should be doing. I was head hunted for it and I think it was possibly rushed as there was no real clear indication or idea from anyone as to what I was really there for.

Due to an incident my boss left and I found myself as a spare part which wasn't a nice feeling but the team still made me feel welcome and gave me more to do. But the incident left me feeling awful. I questioned myself a lot in terms of who I am, what I did to deserve it and whether or not it was my fault for putting trust in someone and being so confident and comfortable with them.

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